Is selfishness good or bad?
Selfishness is absolutely a good thing, for all the irrefutable reasons below:
- Selfishness is how nature works and if you believe in a divine force, god of any kind, how god designed every living being. The puppy or kitten coming out of its mother’s belly, the purest of beings, goes for the best nipple and will push its siblings aside to defend it. When it grows a little bit, it will fight for the best food and has no compunction in taking it, no guilt or shame. Its own mother will growl at it if it tries to take her food.
Every living being is programmed to take care of its own needs as an absolute priority, and this is nature’s way to preserve and propagate life. No creature other than humans feels any need to be selfless, and for humans it is a socially imposed obligation to pretend that we are not selfish, and thus always need to hide and feel guilt and shame, something no other life form feels. It is our own paradoxical self punishment imposed by society and religion that we are saddled with as babies. The Original Sin, the wretched Ego, Bad Karma from a previous life etc. etc.
- When we act selflessly we impose an energetic debt on other people, since it is never real. If that debt is not paid, we get angry: “The bitch! I did all these things for her and look how she repays me!”, “I gave him everything and he betrays me!”, “Ungrateful bastards!” etc.
When I do anything for anybody, I do it selfishly for myself, because it makes me feel good, I like to see them happy, I want them to like me etc., so they never owe me anything and thus my loved ones are free of any obligation and I am free of hypocrisy.
The ones proclaiming that they do everything for others are the most hateful and resentful people. Mothers and fathers often wish to control their children’s lives forever and keep reminding them how they worked hard or sacrificed careers and holidays for them. Bullshit! Parents and lovers make their own choices for their lives.
- Everything and everybody wants to be one with, to love and be loved so everything we do for others should be for the very selfish reason of loving, connecting and should be done as something enjoyable, not as a burden and a sacrifice, because if we do anything for anybody else we are not loving ourselves.
Self love is the biggest gift in the pursuit of happiness, but we are encouraged to love everybody else and punish ourselves. In funerals and obituaries they say things like “He was such a great man, he did everything for others and never did anything for himself”, and we are supposed to feel like weasels because we don’t do the same. Maybe we should compete who will sacrifice more and treat themselves worse and give medals accordingly! Why do you think depression and self hatred is growing at such a rate? Because of these paradoxical social requirements that nobody can fulfill and our subsequent need to hide our natural selfishness, nature’s way of giving every creature the freedom and responsibility to take care of itself!